Dec. 27: When should we get into the Christmas spirit?
December 1, at the very earliest.
I don't want to see any Christmas decorations anywhere throughout the month of November. I never get my wish. It's not even Halloween and the stores in my neck of the woods are already hauling out the Christmas cards and the plastic Santas. I was at Costco the other day and they had artificial Christmas trees for sale. Good grief.
Sometimes I wish I was American. If I was American, Thanksgiving would be in November and that could act as a bullwark against incessant Christmas marketing. Up here, Halloween is the last commercial holiday before Christmas so the stores get all red and green as soon as November hits. Sometimes, I almost expect them to make a commercial event out of Remembrance Day.
Maybe I shouldn't be so hard on Christmas. Without it, plenty of our merchants might not even be in business. I understand that it's a "Christianized holiday" but it's more of a shopping event than it is a religious celebration.
The older I get, the more people I meet who say they're not big fans of Christmas. They just see the whole thing as redundant. Extended family is coming over so let's get the house super clean and spend a lot of money on a turkey and then we'll cram a whole lot of people in a too-small environment. We'll stress ourselves out so we can have a good time.
I vaguely remember being at a family gathering one Christmas. About five minutes before dinner was to be served, a man showed up with his wife. I think the wife was family, the man was her husband. They ate quickly. The woman talked a lot; the man was silent. When he was done, he leaped up, grabbed his coat, and waited impatiently for his wife at the door. I don't think they stayed more than 30 minutes. I remember thinking that man was a jerk.
When I was a kid, I liked Christmas caroling. My dad forbade us to go in early December, insisting that we wait at least one week before Christmas. I have not had carolers call on my house in years. That could be because I live in a walk-up apartment.
One Christmas, my friend's co-worker got a whole bunch of Stephen King novels for Christmas. His roommate had stolen them from somewhere. He said that his roommate stole all his Christmas presents. I said that was a wonderful way to remember Jesus and he told me that he didn't believe in Jesus. Then he lit up a joint. Then he called me an asshole.
The video store near where I live sells pornographic DVDs. Some of them are wrapped in Christmas paper. There's a tag on them advising would-be recipients not to open the paper in the presence of children. Merry Christmas indeed.
Maybe I am turning into the Grinch. There are things I like about Christmas. I like my mom's Christmas pudding, I like the Charlie Brown Christmas special. I like advent calendars. Everyone should have one.
You open the first door on Dec. 1.
And that's a great day to get into the Christmas spirit.
I don't want to see any Christmas decorations anywhere throughout the month of November. I never get my wish. It's not even Halloween and the stores in my neck of the woods are already hauling out the Christmas cards and the plastic Santas. I was at Costco the other day and they had artificial Christmas trees for sale. Good grief.
Sometimes I wish I was American. If I was American, Thanksgiving would be in November and that could act as a bullwark against incessant Christmas marketing. Up here, Halloween is the last commercial holiday before Christmas so the stores get all red and green as soon as November hits. Sometimes, I almost expect them to make a commercial event out of Remembrance Day.
Maybe I shouldn't be so hard on Christmas. Without it, plenty of our merchants might not even be in business. I understand that it's a "Christianized holiday" but it's more of a shopping event than it is a religious celebration.
The older I get, the more people I meet who say they're not big fans of Christmas. They just see the whole thing as redundant. Extended family is coming over so let's get the house super clean and spend a lot of money on a turkey and then we'll cram a whole lot of people in a too-small environment. We'll stress ourselves out so we can have a good time.
I vaguely remember being at a family gathering one Christmas. About five minutes before dinner was to be served, a man showed up with his wife. I think the wife was family, the man was her husband. They ate quickly. The woman talked a lot; the man was silent. When he was done, he leaped up, grabbed his coat, and waited impatiently for his wife at the door. I don't think they stayed more than 30 minutes. I remember thinking that man was a jerk.
When I was a kid, I liked Christmas caroling. My dad forbade us to go in early December, insisting that we wait at least one week before Christmas. I have not had carolers call on my house in years. That could be because I live in a walk-up apartment.
One Christmas, my friend's co-worker got a whole bunch of Stephen King novels for Christmas. His roommate had stolen them from somewhere. He said that his roommate stole all his Christmas presents. I said that was a wonderful way to remember Jesus and he told me that he didn't believe in Jesus. Then he lit up a joint. Then he called me an asshole.
The video store near where I live sells pornographic DVDs. Some of them are wrapped in Christmas paper. There's a tag on them advising would-be recipients not to open the paper in the presence of children. Merry Christmas indeed.
Maybe I am turning into the Grinch. There are things I like about Christmas. I like my mom's Christmas pudding, I like the Charlie Brown Christmas special. I like advent calendars. Everyone should have one.
You open the first door on Dec. 1.
And that's a great day to get into the Christmas spirit.
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