July 29: Adventures at the dentist

 The dentist told me I was brushing my teeth too hard. As a result, my gumline was receding. "You need a gum graft," he said.

A gum graft is when they cut skin off the roof of your mouth and staple it to your gum. It hurts a lot for about a week afterwards. I consumed all kinds of T3s and ate nothing but tapioca pudding. I took a week off work and played video games nonstop. Ashley also visited me. She was good to me while I was recovering from the extremely painful gum graft, which is three times as painful as childbirth.

Here is a picture of me eating tapioca pudding while recovering from the gum graft.


Here is a picture of me playing a video game the day after the operation.


Here is a picture of me watching a Flames game and Riders game simultaneously while recovering from the operation:

This was way back in 2010. My lifestyle has not changed much since then.

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All through elementary school, I never had a cavity. At the end of my checkup, the dentist's assistant would take a Polaroid of me and it would go on the no cavity wall. Then I got to pick a toy out of the treasure chest. Usually it was a bouncy ball.

I seem to remember having a terrible time at the dentist when I was in Grade 1 or so. My permanent incisors were coming in funny, making it necessary to pull some of my baby teeth. I panicked and freaked out and remember the dentist shoving me back in the chair so he could continue his work. I didn't give him an easy time and I sure broke down when I looked in the mirror and saw the big space between my teeth. My mom assured me that the teeth would grow back, but I didn't believe her.

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I have it on good authority that Jarome Iginla takes good care of his teeth and sees his dentist regularly. 

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There are plenty of adventures you can have at the dentist. I like to stick a balloon in my mouth with the words HI THERE on it. Gives them a nice surprise when they are X-raying my teeth,

Another fun thing to do at the dentist is think about your friend's photo-a-day albums and how you've been neglecting to comment on his pictures. Remember that leaving him comments is your entire raison d'etre - not raising kids or watching figure skating or throwing pancakes at old people.

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