Dec. 7: Purple passages

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I am so excited to do this note. My friend, Heather, gave it to me and I do not know if she chose to put the word 'purple' in there because she knows I am a Prince fan. Prince insisted that the word 'Purple' be in the title of his first movie, and it was - Purple Rain. Most movies with purple in the title wind up being good movies. There's Purple Rain and The Purple Rose of Cairo and The Color Purple, which is a dumb title. The reason it's a dumb title is that its first two words are redundant. When I say "Purple" no one asks "Are you talking about the color purple or the species of aardvark known as purple." I'm talking about the colour, dumbass. Another reason that movie title is bad is because they don't spell Color with a U. Silly Americans.

I am such a Prince fan that every one of my notes in August was inspired by a Prince song. Few people noticed this but that's okay. Now I am going to write a paragraph and there will be lots of Prince songs named in it.

I drove down to AMERICA in my LITTLE RED CORVETTE, which is my PRIVATE JOY. IT is a standard, not an AUTOMATIC, and that is CRUCIAL. I picked up a hitchhiker wearing a RASPBERRY BERET and she said her name was ANNA STESIA and she said "will U TAKE ME WITH U?" Sure, I said, and I smiled because LIFE CAN BE SO NICE. We drove to EROTIC CITY and I turned on to ALPHABET STREET and then I stopped because we were hungry. We ordered STARFISH AND COFFEE and a PEACH with CREAM. I know, that meal reeks of ARROGANCE, but I don't care. I'm willing to LETITGO. Now run and tell you mama bout that.

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I went to the Prince concert in Calgary. After the concert, Prince went to a nightclub called Cowboys. He hung out in a private room upstairs and refused to hobnob with his fans (which is fine because some of them are crazy.) Apparently, he played pool and he ate an orange. This is only what an eyewitness told me.

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Prince is shorter than me. I am 5'6". He is 5'2." That is part of the reason I like him.

My grandma gave me the Purple Rain album for Christmas in 1984. I was 11. That was before albums came with those parental advisory warning labels (in fact, Purple Rain is directly responsible for those labels.) This was due to a song called Darling Nikki, which I will not post here because it's filthy. You can google it if you really want to learn the lyrics.

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Here is a passage from the Prince song, Thunder.

'Twas like thunder all through the night
Promise 2 see Jesus in the morning light
Take my hand it'll be alright
Come on save your soul tonight

Love, nobody know just how it was born
Love first came 2 me with the radio on
Jumped up in my body with an attitude
kissed me on the mouth and said 'your leader take me 2'

I think that's cool.

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Back in the early 90s, Warner Brothers put out a 3-CD collection of Prince's greatest hits. Disc 1 is safe songs. Disc 2 is dirty songs. Disc 3 is B-sides. You can only buy Disc 3 if you buy the complete collection. Warner Brothers is bad.

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