Dec. 24: That's the mustache talking

 Whenever I think of mustaches, I think immediately of Lanny McDonald, former captain of the Calgary Flames, particularly the Stanley Cup Champion team of 1989. Lanny's mustache was legendary, a big ginger walrus, and he was known as much for his facial hair as he was for his puck-handling skills.


Lanny McDonald wrote a book, which happens to be in the Dalkeith library near me. I read part of that book when I was in the library one day and I came out of there really liking Lanny McDonald. Lanny is my favourite mustached person ever. Here are some other famously mustached people who are not as good as Lanny McDonald:

- My Grade 9 science teacher, Ken Wasylenko.

- My former boss, JT Grossmith.

- Stacy Keach, who played Mike Hammer on TV.

- Tom Selleck, who played Magnum PI.

- Lemmy of Motorhead (now dead.)

- Freddie Mercury of Queen (also dead.)

By the way, Canada agrees with me because of all the people I mention above, Lanny McDonald is the only one who received the Order of Canada.

-

 Razor blade manufacturers even offered Lanny money if he would shave his mustache off, but he refused. Saying no was a good thing for Lanny to do. That's because his mustache wasn't just hair, it was a brand. It was his personality. It was him. Calgarians would have felt betrayed if Lanny McDonald ever shaved off his mustache. By contrast, my Grade 9 science teacher, Ken Wasylenko, once shaved off his mustache. No one cared. But my Grade 9 science teacher didn't win the Stanley Cup that year. Draw your own conclusions.

-

In his Lanny book, Lanny talked about a brief unhappy tenure with the Colorado Rockies, a team that used to be the perennial bottom dwellers of the National Hockey League. Lanny talked about how the Rockies were trailing a game 3-1 one night and then the coach, Don Cherry, called the team over to the bench.

"Boys," Mr. Cherry allegedly said. "That team you're playing is about six goals better than you and you're holding them to a two-goal lead. I'm proud of you. I'm buying everyone dinner tonight."

Classy move on Don Cherry's part. Don Cherry, who used to be a big part of Hockey Night in Canada, was fired in 2019 for an "insensitive thing" he said about immigrants, particularly their alleged refusal to wear poppies around Remebrance Day. He had a few other missteps over the year but I liked the guy anyway. I still like him and if I saw him on the street, I'd tell him I missed him. Don Cherry is also a big supporter of women's hockey and, like Lanny McDonald and my sister, is an Aquarius.

Even though Don Cherry doesn't have a mustache.

Neither does my sister.

But hey, that's just the mustache talking.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Sept. 13: You don't know what you gave up

Image
 Dear Mr. Man You know, I don't hate you. If I saw you on the street, I wouldn't yell at you or cuss you out, but I don't think I'd shake your hand. But I do pity you, man. You don't know what you gave up. She's going to be a funeral director, did you know that? Yeah, she's going to be a mover and shaker, hitting the big time. She'll have a good job and she'll never be out of work because she's in an industry that will never die (you should pardon the pun.)  Sure, she had her challenges growing up, but what girl doesn't. Things made her cry. Sometimes, I'm sad to say, I was one of those things. But all I can say is the good times outweigh the bad. I hope she agrees with that. You see, Mr. Man, I have a whole lot of great memories with her. This one time, I tried to take her down to Cleveland so we could see a Major League Baseball game live. But we couldn't get into the States so instead, we went to Niagara Falls and we had a grand ol
Read more

Dec.19: The day Steve dropped my Phoenix

 The day Steve dropped my Phoenix I was sleeping He left the papers there outside my door. I laughed when I read the part about the Roughriders, they didn't make the playoffs after all By the time I make my breakfast he'll be working Trying hard to bring the news to us He just don't understand the world has moved on. it's off the wall that's all By the time I get to Jack's Pub he'll be writing a council brief or maybe 20 Q's. we might cry to think he's doing this for nothing but he does it 'cause it's all he knows how to do - apologies to Glen Campbell
Read more

Dec. 10: Brothers over 80

Image
The Irishman is surely the most tragic movie of Martin Scorsese's career. It follows the same trajectory as his other beloved films Goodfellas, Casino, and Wolf of Wall Street. In all of those movies, a criminal's life comes crashing down. In Goodfellas, Ray Liotta's Henry Hill aspires to be a gangster, only to have to betray his mob brothers in the end to avoid a lengthy prison sentence. In Casino, a wannabe enforcer is beaten to death with a baseball bat while his colleague loses his family and winds up a lonely man. In Wolf of Wall Street, a dishonest wall street stockbroker loses his trophy wife and winds up having to betray the very people he helped set up so he can stay out of jail. But in all of the above tales, everyone gets a slice of the good life, at least for a little while. They do copious amounts of drugs, have sex with all kinds of women, and earn a whole lot of money in the process. In the end, they have nothing, but at least there's a mountain in a life
Read more