Dec. 11: Toys no one wants
Here is a list of toys I don't think anyone wants. There could be exceptions. The world is a strange place and there are lots of deviants in it. I make no guarantees to the accuracy of this list. The list is not exhaustive. It is a partial list only. Here we go:
TOYS NO ONE WANTS
- My first proctology set.
- AIDS virus in a box.
- Vancouver Canucks season tickets.
- Roy the Rat salad bar play station.
- Pac Man for Atari 2600 (trust me when I tell you no one wanted that.)
- Donna Wright action figure.*
- Electronic Detective. **
- Let's visit the nursing home scratch n sniff book (especially the section dealing with taco night.)
- Counting to 12 with the Saskatchewan Roughriders. ***
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I can tell you a toy everyone would want:
A FART GUN.
That's a gun that makes people fart when you shoot them with it. There's a volume setting as well.**** I'm pretty sure that everyone would want one and that it would take care of everyone's entertainment needs for the rest of their life.
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* Donna Wright taught me math in grade 7. I don't think anyone would want an action figure of her, even if she could explain how rounding works by pulling the string on her back.
** Except me. Also, no one wants to play it with me.
*** This joke would be funny in 2009. I'm sure at least one of my readers gets the reference.
**** I keep thinking this would be a great premise for a kids' book. Teachers would love me and hate me at the same time.
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