Dec. 7: Chaos everywhere, but all I see is peace and quiet

 I took my son swimming today. While he enjoyed himself at the waterslide, I fell into conversation with the lifeguard, who is in her third year as a sociology major. She told me she was born in Thailand, where her parents worked for an organization that helps refugees. She also spent some time in Mexico and the United States before ultimately winding up in Canada.

Like me, the lifeguard is a Christian. She told me that she finds religion fascinating and is particularly interested in certain facets of Christian fundamentalism that deny climate change. We both agreed that it's not a good witness for us to throw our garbage everywhere and say: "It's okay, Jesus will clean it up."

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I was dreaming when I wrote this, forgive me if it goes astray.

But when I woke up this morning could have sworn it was Judgment Day.

The sky was all purple there were people running everywhere

trying to run from my destruction, you know I didn't even care.

Those are the opening lyrics to the Prince song, 1999, which Dave Chapelle quoted in the opening of one of his standup comedy specials. I don't know what the point of that song is other than it preaches a popular axiom of those in their early 20s, which is that partying is a satisfying religion and we may as well have as much fun as possible because we never know when it's going to end.

But he mentioned Judgment Day.

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I am writing these words at 10:30 in the evening. My son is pestering me because he wants me to make him toast, get Caillou on the DVD player, and cuddle him. My apartment is a mess. It's a strange mix of dirty clothes, Christmas presents, and stuff from my storage room (in September, my landlord asked me to clean it out. I don't know why. It's my storage room.*) So basically, my apartment is chaotic. But in my writing room, there is peace and quiet.

I have to say that I enjoy writing these little note-a-day things. I like doing magic shows, but I think that my favourite gift God gave me is my ability to use the written word.

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On the way back from the swimming pool, I listened to one of my favourite audiobooks, which is Roadwork by Richard Bachman. In it, Thomas Carlyle is quoted. "The great dead locomotive of the world." I liked that. It's true. Life might very well be meaningless. Maybe our jobs, our families, our hobbies, our favourite sports teams, all these things that we call our lives are just a futile attempt to find some kind of meaning in the abyss.

And the scary thing is that the world is filled with billions of people who are in the exact same boat.

Thank God I believe in Him.

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I got all sorts of phone calls on the day that Prince died. Evidently, my admiration for Prince was the stuff of legends. A friend called me from Europe to make sure I was okay. A girl I hadn't spoken to since high school emailed me and said she thought of me the second she heard the news.

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Exactly 100 kilometres west of Calgary, there is a lake with an island in the middle of it. It has one picnic table on it. I call it Picnic Table Island. It is a small island. If I took my family there, we might suffer from claustrophobia. 

There is a factory on that lake. There are smokestacks that belch grey and black clouds into the air. It is ugly. But the cool thing is that if you turn around, you won't see the factory anymore. Instead, you'll see grey mountains dotted with green fir trees. You'll see snow on the top of those mountains. You'll see nature. You'll see beauty.

So is there chaos or is there order? I guess that depends on your perspective.

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Prince's song 1999 ends with a child asking: "Mommy, why does everybody have a bomb?"

When I first heard that song, I though the child was saying: "Mommy, why does everybody have a bum?"

I wish Prince was still alive so I could tell him that story.

* A lot of the stuff in my storage room did not belong to me. Apparently, a former tenant was using it as his de facto storage unit too. He moved out and left that stuff with me. I had to clean it out. Next time I see him limping around town, I will have words with him.